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A Dozen Days |
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Posted at Friday, April 25, 2008 |
Almost nine months ago, I remember telling your mum that she's probably not pregnant, even though she was pretty sure she was. I was telling her that we couldn't be so lucky. But when I saw that blue line, I was glad we were. I still remember calling my parents to tell them the good news. I was pretty much at a loss for words then.
I was truly happy beyond words. But your mum was afraid. It was afterall going to be a much more trying experience for her than me. I think we were both full of questions on whether we were truly prepared for your arrival in our lives. It's been a tiring nine months for your mum but I think we're as prepared for you now as anyone possibly can be.
The first time we saw you - we were both amazed that you were so small. We seemed to measure our lives based on the next visit to the hospital to see you. Each month was a milestone - a major step towards holding you in our arms.
And so nine months later, here we are. Less than two weeks and you'll be out. Sometimes, I just can't seem to concentrate on much else but think of what you'll be like. You'll probably bring us more headaches than we ever thought possible. But in the end you'll also bring us more joy than we would ever know... |
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13 days |
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Posted at Thursday, April 24, 2008 |
to go...
Time just flies.. I'm finally on leave (been waiting for this day) and will only go back to work end July! It's the only thing that people is envious of me.. Haha.. Cos I get paid not working.. But at the same time, I am also worried cos I really don't know if I can handle a baby, I guess being a first-time mum is definitely not going to be easy and I hope I will make it through.
Now my only job is to pack up the stuff at home and wait patiently for Matthias to come.
Saw my gynae yesterday morning instead cos he was going to have a meeting in the evening. The morning clinic is much more crowded than the evening one, I guess cos it's much cheaper(like $20 difference). I was abit blur blur cos it's the first time I went to that clinic. Went for my usual routine test, take weight, BP and urine test. Was really surprised that my weight dropped 1kg and worried if Matthias is doing well inside. BP was abit high but think it's probably normal towards the end of pregnancy. Gynae said Matthias is now 3.1kg, growing well so I guess my 1kg lost doesn't matter. In the end, he didn't check my cervix and said will do it next week. But luckily he didn't cos if any dilation, afraid have to induce and Mal is having his last paper this Sat.
Then when I went to office, 1 of my colleague told me that losing weight means baby is going to be out soon and said give me 3 days. Wow.. I'm really not hoping for that cos I'm not mentally prepared for him to come out before May. In the evening, I told my mum about my weight lost, she also said the same. But seriously, I haven't really feel much contractions, there is no "show" or whatsoever so I really don't know what/when to expect. Just felt he's been really active recently, kept moving around and I read somewhere that their movement supposed to reduce alittle after engaging but it doesn't seem like that. But of cos, moving is good cos at least I know he's doing well.
In any case, dear Matthias, please stay in my tum for another 7 days. Let mummy have a good rest first and daddy to concentrate on his exams. :) |
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posted by Lifeisprecious =) 9:50 PM 
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17 |
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Posted at Sunday, April 20, 2008 |
Yesterday was a mixed bag.
Scratched the car in the morning against some shrubs - no thanks to a crappy driver who had to hog a major part of the driveway and forced me to keep far too left. Oh well, nothing that some polishing and paintwork can't fix.
Then the exams. I wrote or rather scribbled for almost three hours and at the end of it, I still don't know what I was writing. Oh well, at least I know I'm still capable of churning out rubbish at an impressive rate.
And then in the evening, went to my Grandma's place to celebrate her birthday. It was really fun to see all my uncles, aunties, cousins, my nephews and my niece all in one place. But it was really sad at the same time to see my Grandma in her current state. I can't help but wonder whether she's truly aware of her surroundings anymore.
Old age - that's something we all gotta face. But in some ways, it's harder for the people around you than for yourself to face it. When I sometimes think of your grandparents, I can't help but realise that they aren't young anymore. I sometimes wonder how I would feel if they were to be gone one day - and there's always a lump in my throat when I consider that possibility.
So dear Matthias, my advice to you today is a simple one. Cherish your family. Always. That's about as simple as that. I have to admit that I never really did that when I was younger. I guess I always took my family for granted. I guess I only really woke up when your cousin Ethan was born. Suddenly, it hit home that my brother was a father. I was suddenly an uncle. My parents were grandparents... And somehow, I came to accept that they weren't quite that young anymore. And it also seemed to me that your cousin Ethan was growing up so fast...
Somewhere around that time, I came to truly realise how important my family was to me. And that was when I decided to get my priorities in life set straight.
So dear Matthias and your siblings to come, I don't expect you'll understand this point all that well. I guess most of us never do when we are young. But one day I'm sure you will... |
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The Big Two O |
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Posted at Thursday, April 17, 2008 |
20 days to go. It's Thursday. Got an exam on Saturday... Gotta start studying.. Gotta stop working at night... Gotta wait for you to come out... Oh well, gonna blog first and shutdown my laptop and go study. That'll do it.
Ok, I'm just going to carry on a little from yesterday. Yesterday, I said not to argue unnecessarily. Today, it's not to lose your temper unnecessarily. Or better still, don't lose it at all. Every one has a different fuse - some shorter than others. You'll find your parents to be quite different in terms of how we handle our tempers. We both have our bad points so well, I hope you pick up only on the good.
Whenever you find something that really makes you angry, try to put yourself in the shoe of the other person. Try to understand why the person did the things he did. Maybe he was brought up differently - so maybe he's just doing what was natural to him. Through understanding, you may find things to be just that little bit easier to swallow and accept. And thereby, your temper may cool somewhat.
And when you find it really hard to control, just take a hike. Sometimes it's better to do and say nothing than to find yourself doing or saying something you will regret later. Anger is an ugly beast - always remember that and never let it get the better of you. |
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Day 21 |
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Posted at Wednesday, April 16, 2008 |
We just saw you again. Think you were sleeping as you didn't move much. Well anyway, the doctor said you were engaged. So I guess it's really anytime now...
Well your lesson for the day - Learn to back off from an argument when there's clearly no way out. Often in times, you'll find that your opinions differ from another person. And sometimes, you may get into arguments over your point of views. You may try your best to convince the other person of the soundness of your way and vice versa. And if things get out of hand, you may find yourself arguing more and more vigorously.
Well, in times like this, take a step back, think of something else and let it go. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and when you have already tried your best to prove otherwise, then there's really no point in getting upset that they don't see things the way you do. Afterall, if everyone saw things the same way, the world wouldn't be in such a mess now.
That said, it's important for you to keep an open mind as well and to always accept that you may be wrong. You can't always be right - but then that doesn't mean you should be indecisive. Be firm in knowing that you are right but at the same time, be open to the possibility that you may be wrong. It's a fine line to thread I know, but it can be done.
As you grow up, you'll find that there'll be a set of guiding principles in your life that will govern the way you do things. And as long as the principles are intact, you'll be able to differentiate what's right and what's wrong and learn to recognise when you may sometimes be on the wrong side of the fence. |
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22 days more... |
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Posted at |
I think daddy forgot to blog or probably he's busy studying for his exams.
Mummy was working from home yesterday cos like your daddy said, we always have to be considerate. Mummy didn't want to spread my flu virus to my colleagues, hence the best choice is to "isolate" myself and work from home.
Nothing much happened yesterday other than your daddy slept for 2 hours after he came home from work. Hehe.. He must have been feeling really tired. I hope he's just tired and not because mummy passed the virus to him.
Mummy hopes the maid will arrive in Singapore soon cos mummy can feel Matthias is coming soon. Hopefully everything will go on smoothly..
See you in 22 days or probably lesser... |
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posted by Lifeisprecious =) 9:23 AM
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Day 23 |
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Posted at Monday, April 14, 2008 |
We went to Harbourfront today to visit the new Mothercare store and we passed by a shop that specialised in baby haircuts, baby massage and more interestingly baby swimming! It's basically putting a baby into a pre-heated bathtub sized just for one - I saw a baby swimming there and he looked pretty happy. Hmm I think we'll probably sign you up for weekly sessions there. Hope you will enjoy it too!
Well your mummy's still not feeling too well. Having sore throat and runny nose again. And I guess you're aren't helping much by kicking so often. Well, medication and rest will help cure her.
So I was saying this morning - Be patient. Be punctual. And now - be considerate. Always be considerate of others. When saying something, think of how the other person would feel. When doing something, think of how your actions will affect others. And yes, it's true that even if you're considerate of others, they may not reciporate your kindness. But still, that's no reason to stop being considerate. Always think of others and you'll generally find the world that you live in to be a pretty good one. |
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Day 24 |
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Posted at |
It's Monday morning. Typing a short one now as we were too tired after Theodore's birthday chalet yesterday. Well your mummy and I have a lot to say about the chalet... But nothing good, so I won't put them down here.
Well, your mummy wanted me to teach you one thing which I'm lacking somewhat - Patience. And it's true. It's important to be patient and to sometimes to allow things to run its course. Not everything will come to you at the time and place where you want it to. Maybe the timing isn't right but all you need is the patience to see it through and one day, it will surely come to you.
That said, another thing to remember is always to be punctual. Don't ever keep others waiting if you can. Respect the time and effort of others enough to turn up on time for them. That leads me to another point, which I'll save for tonight... |
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25 more days |
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Posted at Saturday, April 12, 2008 |
.. before holding you in our arms .. Every day seems like a long day ..
I'm feeling alot better today except for stuffy nose, occasional runny nose and uncomfortable throat. Oh well.. At least the fever has subsided.
These 2 days going to be eating alot for dinner (and mind you, they are all heaty!) cos it's Theodore's first birthday tomorrow. Can you imagine how time flies? My sister booked Downtown East chalet for him and it's on the second floor! How inconvenient for me! I'm going to be climbing up and down the stairs (Gosh!). Probably some good exercise for me though.. Just now there was a real heavy rain probably all around Singapore but seems like the rain stopped for quite a while already and hope it remains that way cos we are going to have BBQ tonight.. (Too bad I cannot eat sotong..) Tomorrow, my sister's friends and my relatives will be coming to celebrate his birthday, think he will get a shock since there is going to be alot of people. But he's friendly so I think he can let anyone carry him. My poor mummy and aunt have to help my sister prepare the food. Hopefully everything turns out well and I hope I don't get sick on Monday after the feast.
Alright, back to myself and Matthias. Recently, I kept feeling some pain at the vaginal area, as if something is there. It's been occurring more frequent and I realised I cannot walk too much especially after I have my meal cos I will feel that pain. I also feel the urge to go toilet very often even though there isn't much liquid. I am wondering if Matthias has already engaged himself cos some people said that is probably the baby's head engaged.
Also, I realised more and more stretchmarks are appearing although I have made it a point to apply the oil but seems like it's not helping. Sigh.. I guess it doesn't make a difference now. Why do woman have to go through this? Putting on weight is definitely not the scariest part, it's the "zebra crossing" that puts me off!
Anyway, I wonder if he has gained much weight since his mummy didn't eat alot the past 2 days cos of the fever. Well.. We'll find out soon.
Hi Matthias, daddy and mummy will be seeing you on the scan again this Wednesday! Hope you are doing fine and growing well. (And also hoping I haven't gained too much weight) :) |
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posted by Lifeisprecious =) 2:05 PM
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Day 26 |
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Posted at Friday, April 11, 2008 |
Ok your mummy's feeling better... Think she'll be alright soon enough...
Well I just came back from lessons. Last lesson of this module. Two more weeks and this term is over. Just four more terms to go... It just doesn't seem to get any easier - but I think when I hold you in my arms, I'm gonna find the motivation all over again.
It's getting kinda tough to think of what to say. So maybe just this: Listen.
Yup, listen more.
Scores of people and books will tell you this: People like to talk more than listen. People like to talk about themselves. People will hear everything but listen to nothing. Lotsa similar quotes. So how come so many of us still fall into the same trap?
I guess it helps that I don't like to talk much naturally. It helps me listen better.
You don't always need to point out the mistakes of others - it's alright to let them carry on talking.
You don't always need to be right. Sometimes it's alright to let others think they are right.
You don't always need to be loud. Often times it's more important to say the right things than to say useless things out loud.
In the end, it just boils down to this. Talk less. Listen more. Understand more. That's about it I geuss. |
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27 days to go... |
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Posted at Thursday, April 10, 2008 |
Alright, today mummy shall blog!
Just want to let my dear Matthias and even his siblings know that it's not easy going through pregnancy. It's physically and emotionally strenuous! So next time, you must appreciate your mother and your wife. Of cos, it's tough on your daddy too!
Today, Mummy fell ill, having throat infection and running a fever. So this is a short blog. I hope Matthias, you are fine inside my tummy, perhaps a little warm.
Mummy and Daddy loves you and shall wait another 27 days.. :)
*Mummy going to rest so that I can recover soon* |
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posted by Lifeisprecious =) 9:24 PM
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28 Days Later |
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Posted at Wednesday, April 09, 2008 |
... and you'll be born!
Well your mum and dad finally got off their lazy butts and went swimming. We think you enjoyed as much as we did. At least you weren't kicking as much...
So what to say today? Well I heard this song on radio today and it recently became one of my favourites because of its meaningful lyrics.
I'm a little old and jaded. The moon is just the moon. The stars are just little sparks in the sky. The ocean is vast but it doesn't quite awe me as it once might have. And that's my problem. I just can't quite seem to be truly amazed anymore. And that's why I think this song is great. And that's why I hope you do as the song sings:
Lee Ann Womack - I Hope You Dance I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat
But always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart
Leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out
Reconsider
Give the heavens above
More than just a passing glance And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance
(Time is a real and constant motion always)
I hope you dance
(Rolling us along)
I hope you dance
(Tell me who)
I hope you dance
(Wants to look back on their youth and wonder)
(Where those years have gone) I hope you still feel small
When you stand by the ocean
Whenever one door closes, I hope one more opens
Promise me you'll give faith a fighting chance And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
Dance
I hope you dance
I hope you dance
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Day 29 |
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Posted at Tuesday, April 08, 2008 |
Hello Matthias. Or your sister. Or your brother. Whoever it may be.
It's 29 more days before we expect you in our arms.
So what do I have for you today? Can't think of much. Perhaps just this: never worry about being number one. I think my biggest worry for you even before you are born is how are you going to be educated. Looking at today's educational system, it's a pressure cooker indeed. Both your mum and dad went through it fine. But what happens if you don't quite make it, I wonder?
But a recent video I watched helped me realise that it doesn't quite matter. You don't have to be good in everything. You just have to find that one thing in which you are great and that's good enough to start. You just have to find that one thing in which you have a passion and make that your forte. And in life, when you work hard enough, you'll invariably be rewarded with the fruits of your labour.
The video spoke of a story about how a young girl was constantly fidgeting about in class and couldn't quite keep still. The school counsellor called up her mother to talk to her about the girl's behaviour. While in the room, the girl had to sit on her hands to keep from moving about too much. Eventually, the counsellor and her mother left the room, but not before the counsellor turned on the radio to play some music. When they were about to return to the room, they stood outside and saw her dancing to the music. And then and there, the counsellor turned to the little girl's mother and said "Your girl doesn't belong here. She's a dancer. Send her to dance school." And so her mother did. And that little girl eventually grew up to become a famous dancer and choreographer.
So you may not be a dancer. You may not be a maths whiz or a science genius. You may not top your class or do fantastically well in all your subjects. But at the end of the day, none of that really matters. In the end, I'm sure you'll eventually find something in which you are great at. And when you do, you can be sure we'll support you fully in it... |
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30 days |
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Posted at Monday, April 07, 2008 |
Yup, it's been a while indeed. Time has once again swooshed right past me and now there's just 30 days left before our precious pops up from his mother's womb. I just came back from a late night jog - peaceful and quiet - a perfect time to gather one's thoughts.
And invariably, my thoughts always led to him.
What will he be like?
And more importantly, what will I be like?
I'm just 28 years old, barely so in fact. What kind of lessons could I possibly impart to this little one? Somehow, I think he'll be teaching me more. Teaching me to be more curious. Teaching me to be more patient. Teaching me that in the child's mind, nothing is impossible or improbable.
And so, 30 days before he comes, perhaps I should try to put together some thoughts for him and his siblings to come - once a day, one at a time. Useful or not, I don't know. But perhaps when he's 28 years old, he can look back and see how his father once viewed the world.
And so begins my little nugget for day 30...
What better way than to start with my favourite phrase of all: "If you're falling down a cliff, you may as well try to fly." When all else fails, you might as well try to reach for the impossible. Well, I've never really had to put this into practise - but that's probably because I've never really taken any major risks in life. Like most of my peers, I've usually chosen the safer path. Never tried too hard to do anything impossible. At least not yet. But it looks unlikely that I ever will.
So my dear Matthias, I don't know if you'll lead your life any different from mine. But if you do, I hope you bear this phrase in mind. If you do take risks, you're almost certain to fail at times. But in failure, you might have the chance to create something better. And you know what else, you can be sure that your daddy and mummy will be behind you every step of the way.
Well that's the beginning and end of pep talk 101... I hope when you finally look at this, you might see some of your father in you. If so, then I would know that I have brought you up well indeed... |
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Congrats, you are both gonna hold your son in your hands very soon. God bless and take care!